Mellissa Gilbert, born Matilda Lee Roeniker in 1959, has passed after a short bout with an undisclosed illness. Ms. Gilbert hadn’t been in the public spotlight for quite some time but was once well known as the spirited “Half-Pint,” the middle daughter on AMC’s Little House on the Prairie. She was the last surviving cast member.

Gilbert left acting when the show ended, opting for a neuroscience degree. After several years of research into the causal effects of quarks on charged protons, she took an opportunity to run for public office. In a landslide win, Mellissa Gilbert became Kendallville, Indiana’s first female Republican mayor. The following year, she ran for Congress and squeaked a narrow win over local favorite Destiny Ashbaucher (D-Ligioner) after leaked photos of Ashbauchher engaged in a sex act with her father leaked online.

Gilbert only served one term and left public life to take a teaching job in Decatur, Illinois. Her daughter, Mellissa Gilbert, landed a spot there on the hit show “Roseanne” and the family prospered. They eventually had a falling out when the younger Gilbert revealed she was gay, which went against her mother’s Christian values.

The family has asked for privacy during this time of mourning so they can try to figure out how any of this makes sense. A spokesman for Melissa Gilbert, Joe Barron, said misinformation at a time like this can destroy a person’s legacy. “They’re sisters, and this is the dumbest thing I’ve ever read,” said Barron, “you’ll hear from our attorneys.”

Independent agencies haven’t verified or debunked the sources of this report. Or maybe they have. God bless you, Mellissa Gilbert, for all the memories and for your service to the Republican party.


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